Putting your life into perspective.
I’ve always been a goal setter and a list maker. I love the feeling of crossing something off your to-do list. There is a downside to these lists however, especially if you take them as seriously as I do. If one or two things remain uncrossed, then I deem the entire list a complete failure. I keep little to-do lists for shopping and things that need to be done within the next day. I also make many lists of goals for the next month or two. Not only that, but I’ve also tried making lists of goals for the next 2.75 years. If any of you have heard about the 101 in 1001 lists, then you know what I’m talking about. If you don’t, then the 101 in 1001 list is a list of 101 goals/things you’d like to accomplish in the next 1001 days, which equals out to be around 2.75 years. Originally I thought this was a great idea, and the list was fun to make, however after I failed to keep at my second attempt with the list, I realized that it doesn’t work so well for a couple reasons.
1. It puts a time limit on your goals, and sometimes, life just doesn’t work around your time limits.
2. You need to come up with 101. For some this might be terribly difficult which will result in writing down goals that one doesn’t really want to stick with. These things are usually things that sound like fun to you, but you wouldn’t actually want to go through the steps that it takes to do it. You don’t actually want to invest the time and effort it takes to get these things done. And for others, 101 things is not enough and then you need to exclude things. Either way, putting a limit on how many goals you should make for yourself in the next 2.75 years is a bad idea. I admit, the name sucks you in – at least it sucked me in.
So after I failed to keep at my second list, I decided to just take a break. I thought I wasn’t ready to commit myself to such goals. Until I realized that it’s not me that’s the problem, but the list. I began to realize the two mentioned points and decided to change this infamous list to my own type of list. I took the number restrictions away and wrote down as many goals as I wanted. The best part is, that this list is a sitemap for my life. Every single goal on the list will help me achieve my ultimate goal – which is to be the best I can be and fill my life with happiness. Some goals are long term, serious goals, and some others are more casual, fun goals that can be achieved within the near future. The important thing however, is that if the casual goals won’t be able to be completed within the near future, the list will not be deemed a failure, because I have my whole life to do the goals. This is of course thinking that I will live long enough to fulfill every goal on my list, but I digress.
It is also important to allow for change. This is something I’ve never done before, because a list seems pretty concrete to me. But when you’re doing a list of goals for your life, you can’t make it concrete, no matter how hard you try. If you tell yourself that you will definitely have to finish every single item on that list before you die, then the list will most likely fail. This is due to the simple fact that we, humans, change. As we age, our tastes change, our views might change, and our physical abilities also change. For example, I have a lot of travel destinations on my list, but I’ve never been to Africa (except Morocco), so who’s to say that once I visit Rwanda, I will still want to go to Nigeria. Of course I know myself well enough to be almost certain that I would travel to other African countries even if I didn’t like the first one I traveled to, but, you just never know. Perhaps by then I will learn something interesting about a different African country and so said other African country will go higher on my list than Nigeria. Similarly, just because I don’t have things such as “Climb Mount Everest” or “Go Skydiving” on my list, it doesn’t mean that they might not go on there at one point in time. My physical situation at the moment is not so great, but perhaps in a few years I will strengthen my body enough to feel comfortable with such an adventure.
That being said, take a look at my list (in the Life List tab) and perhaps do one of your own. It’s a great way to set your life in perspective, and it’s fun to put together. Just remember, think about every single goal you choose. Think about the way you will achieve it, and that should give you a pretty good idea of how realistic it is. For example, although I would like to be a millionaire, I think the chances of that happening are very rare. Therefore, I don’t make that a goal. Instead, I make it a goal to achieve financial sustainability. This way, I can work hard to make the most money that I can make, and if that will turn out to be millions, then that’s an extra bonus. Otherwise, it’s okay even if I just make a comfortable living. It doesn’t matter if your list only has 5 goals or if it has as many as 200 goals, it’s your own list and your own life. The important thing is to make a list that will not only help you put your life into perspective but that will also inspire you to be the best you can be.
If you decide to make a list, or already have one, and it’s published online, let me know. I would love to read it.
6 Responses to “Putting your life into perspective.”
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I write about self-improvement. I write about my conception of beauty and love. I write about happiness and traveling. I write about cherishing the old. And I write Monday - Friday.
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I used to be a BIG list maker. I loved lists and loved to cross things off of them. Then if I did something that wasn’t on my list, I would add it so I could cross it off. It was rather silly, but it gave me the sense of accomplishment.
In the last few years I’ve stopped making lists (except for grocery lists which I usually forget at home). Now I’m concentrating on letting my days flow and meet whatever happens head on, trying hard to live in the moment and to remember to count my blessings. I’ve found I’m less stressed about all I “should” get done and when I look back on my days, I usually ended up accomplishing more than I would have had I had a list.
Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..What Does Your Blog Say About You
Hi Barbara, that’s a really good point. For some people, if not most, not making lists might be a good thing, like it is for you. I don’t think it would work for me, because my memory is horrible. If I don’t make that grocery list I will most likely forget something. If I don’t make my to-do list I have been known to forget a due date or a meeting – even though I also keep things written in my agenda.
However, I am trying to not be so hard on myself anymore. What my boyfriend does, he keeps his lists on his computer in a simple Word Document file, then, if he doesn’t do something on his to do list, he simply moves it down a day. I find this to be a good system, because deleting things on the list is satisfying and it’s good to be reminded of what needs to be done, but if it’s not done, you can easily move it down a day, and still your to-do list will look complete. I think it might be a bit less stressful that way, at the end of the day you don’t see things that aren’t crossed out.
I agree with Barbara.
I believe in letting life move at its own pace and accepting everything it throws at me with pleasure. It’s a more relaxed approach to living day-to-day happy and not so happy moments.
I agree on the fact that if we try to stick to a list of set goals and out of the countless goals if we fail to accomplish even one, it ruins the pleasure of having succeeded in the rest.
Why let go of the pleasure of accomplishing whatever we actually achieve?Let’s live every moment as it unfolds before us and leave lists only for grocery shopping (which I too often forget to take along).
Excellent post there.
Keep up the wonderful work.
Cheers!!
Chatterbox´s last blog ..Love Hurts (concluding part)
Hi Chatterbox, thanks for stopping by! There definitely is something extremely nice about not keeping lists and living life one day at a time. I’m currently working on not focusing on that one thing that I do not cross off my lists, rather focus on the things that I have accomplished. I feel like this also benefits me in the long run, because I tend to finish more if there is less pressure.
I am an obsessive list maker when it comes to daily and weekly activities, but I’ve only recently started compiling a list of life goals… I heard about 101 in 1001 a while back and thought it was a great idea, but I’ve been finding it hard to make my own list. The “what if I don’t manage to accomplish some of the items in time?” holds me back, so I think I end up being a tad too realistic or safe sometimes. After reading this I think I will try again. Maybe the key is to give myself permission to write down anything and everything, while keeping in mind that it’s totally okay if I don’t accomplish (or don’t want to accomplish) some of the goals – a continuously evolving life list perhaps!
Great post as usual, got me thinking :)
Alana´s last blog ..Duct tape dress form
Hi Alana. I think you should definitely give it another try – but if you found it difficult to make a 101 in 1001 the first time around, I would suggest you definitely try some along the lines of a Life List. Of course it doesn’t have to be a life list, it can be a list for the next 5 years or 10 years or whatever you want. I do think that the key is to not limit your numbers, write as many or as little as you want. It’s all okay, as long as they are meaningful to you. And yes, please keep in mind that it’s okay if you don’t cross all of them off, or if down the line you want to change some of them because they just aren’t meaningful to you anymore – circumstances change, people change. Everything changes and when making a list for x amount of years, change is a very important thing to incorporate in the list. Hope you have fun with it if you decide to make an evolving life list – I like that!