Livestrong.
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What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, right? I’ve been contemplating this question for years, and I have yet to come up with a definite answer. Some days I want to say that yes, it’s true. Some other days I think it’s just a pretty saying. It’s hard to believe that when you’re going through something painful, unless you’re some kind of a super human, as some people have proven to be. I am completely amazed by the power people have, and when I hear stories of people fighting their disease or whatever hardship comes their way, I am filled with joy and pride. I might not even know them, but I’m proud of them. I am proud of our humanity when we can fight that which is endangering our lives too soon. Everyone should have a fair chance of living their full course, but unfortunately that is not the case. I accept that, but I also think that sometimes, people can change their outcome by staying positive and holding on to whatever hope they’ve got. It’s a hard thing to do, and to be honest, if I were to be diagnosed with cancer, I don’t think I would be able to look at the bright side of things, at least not right now. There is still so much that I want to do in life, and I think this feeling wouldn’t change depending on age. There is always so much more that someone wants to do. So much more that someone wants to be. But perhaps, that is exactly what would make someone fight for their life. The drive to live, to do more, to experience more, to be more.
There are many people in this world who have been incredibly brave, facing their disease and ultimately winning the battle, partly because of this drive. To talk about someone that mostly everyone knows, Lance Armstrong is one of those people. He was born in 1971 and at the young age of 22 he became the youngest road-racing world champion. This was in 1993. Just 3 years after his glory, he was diagnosed with a pretty bad case of testicular cancer. I’m sure he was scared, and I’m sure he had days when he too couldn’t look on the bright side of things. No one, not even super humans, look forward to dealing with hardships, and no looks forward to a battle with death. Some people, upon receiving such bad news, sink into a deep depression. They become stressed and they withdraw from society and even from their own life. Who can blame them? Fear is a strong emotion, and sometimes, people cannot shake it off. But what if a cancer patient knew that by believing they will be okay, they actually have a higher chance of winning their battle?
I read about a study of a company that had closed down when our economic problem started a while back. Something like two-thirds of the workers that lost their jobs sank into depression. The rest actually flourished. The key? They kept a positive outlook. Instead of thinking that their lives will now be miserable because of the lack of income, the people who flourished jumped head first into something else. Some started their own business and did that which they couldn’t do while working. Some others were hired somewhere else, which had a lot to do with their positive thinking. They believed that they can get the job, and their confidence showed, making them a better candidate than others who believed their chance was lower because so many others were looking for a job.
So why are some people able to keep a positive outlook whereas others are prone to stress and depression? A recent study found that people who keep a positive outlook on life when life hits them with a bunch of lemons, have superior coping strategies. They view adversity as an opportunity to grow. The study also found that most of the people who had these superior coping strategies had stressful childhoods, but unlike others with stressful childhoods, they received a lot of support and encouragements from peers, parents and teachers. This helped them “toughen up” and retain important coping strategies.
Does Lance Armstrong fit that definition? Did he have a stressful childhood with a lot of encouragement and support? I don’t know, but I can assume he did. After all, he did win the world championship at the mere age of 22. Whenever someone achieves something great, you can almost be certain that they achieved it not only because of their passion and drive for whatever it may be, but also because they learned valuable lessons of coping with criticism and failure. Lance Armstrong, and people like him, have the ability to embrace adversity and also convert it into triumph. And that’s exactly what he did. Just half a year after being diagnosed, he started training again. In 1999, he made a comeback and won the Tour de France. To date, he’s won… 8 Tours.
And according to him, he certainly came out stronger because of what he had faced. In his book It’s Not About the Bike, he writes:
Odd as it sounds, I would rather have the title of cancer survivor than winner of the Tour, because of what it has done for me as a human being, a man, a husband, a son, and a father.
Perhaps, if you have the right outlook on life, things that don’t kill you, do in fact make you stronger. It certainly made Lance Armstrong a better man. What do you think?
6 Responses to “Livestrong.”
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I write about self-improvement. I write about my conception of beauty and love. I write about happiness and traveling. I write about cherishing the old. And I write Monday - Friday.
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Super post! Great question to KEEP ASKING! The more we think (and write) and persist, the more we discover.
You ask “Why are some people able to keep a positive outlook whereas others are prone to stress and depression?” Because to them sunshine outclasses darkness. To some there is greater pay-off by being negative, avoiding risk, not trying. A box of chocolates or other quick-fix rewards more- short-term.
But, happiness is a better drug. Love is an A1 addiction. When a person discovers that we all can switch into happiness at will, the brain turns us automatically in the direction of better choices at any moment.
Focus on joy, happy things, beautiful people, delight in the feelings and great beliefs that come as a result, and keep doing the same, creates a “virtuous circle” upwards from depression. As soon as a negative input of any kind comes, immediately embrace joy, laughter, from the memory bank plus the imagination palette we carry. Smile in the mirror for 5 mins. daily. Kill sad thought like bacteria with instant sunshine of happy ideas, imaginary super situations and lots of congratulatory hugs. Go out and hug someone! If you get a negative idea, treat it with the same medicine: hugs, smiles, laughter, and making someone else happy.
I used to be depressed. Now, I never am. I can enter happiness just as soon as I deliberately choose that direction. In fact, you are making me feel happy now. So, I smile, encourage you, and hug your visitors as well as yourself. (They can’t escape as it is virtual!)
TEST: Whoever reads this, I guarantee has a lurking or actual smile breaking out. So, they use the same secret!
Best wishes. Thank you again for your post!
Alastair Lancaster´s last blog ..Hug Special 1
Hi Alastair! I think it definitely takes a bit of work to be able to look at things the positive way and embrace the happy when we feel nothing but sad – however it is as possible as anything else. It’s possible to learn to be optimistic. Right now I’m reading a wonderful book called Learned Optimism by the well known Martin Seligman. It’s a wonderful book, and I would recommend this to anyone who is interested in learning to leave their negativity behind. Perhaps I will write a review on it once I’ve completed it. Thanks for the comment, insightful as usual!
Ah! You’re right. It takes “work”. One to three months, actually. At first, trying to be happy makes you sad. It reminds you of what you lack. The more we tremble just wishing, the more old habits comfort us. We need propulsion to get us out of our fixed orbit. We have to sabotage old ways. Setting fire to your trousers motivates. A bomb nearby clears the mind. And we can create both.
Also maybe, we need a ‘photo album’ of new options. It can be just in our head. Better if it is real. I had a scrapbook in which I put anything that made me happy. Actually, it was a classified telephone directory. I tore our every 2nd and 3rd page. So instead of 1,300 yellow pages there was a 430-odd one for sticking any newspaper cutting or photo. Pictures from brochures and so on. Past and future success could be blended. A personal blog can do the same thing.
The key is immediate switching. Get allergic to negativity. Refuse it time. Undermine its influence by diving into any real-good emotion. Read, see how the writer got the effect. I read Dickens with a friend on Skype every evening. He broke from dire poverty. As a child, he worked sticking labels on bottles in boot blacking factory. His own family never knew until after his death! Clues for success abound in his books.
Like what? Break the rules. Make them up. Throw showers of words at readers for fun. Hide jokes. Feel free to say anything, in a way that nobody can resist. Play. Use thousands of word-pictures, so it is like a movie. He wrote in weekly episodes. Like an escape artist, he had to keep getting out of impossible situations. He created his own new world. And loved the journey. Be a detective. Happiness is a matter of following clues persistently.
By the way, have a wonderful time in Wales!
Alastair Lancaster´s last blog ..Hug Special 2
I like how you said “the more we tremble just wishing, the more old habits comfort us”. This is so completely true. I’ve been a victim of this for as long as I can remember, but I’ve been working hard on getting rid of my bad habits. Can’t say I’m fully there yet, but when I compare my state of mind to how it was a year ago, I can honestly say I am in a much better place at the moment. I think I will pick up a copy of Dickens while in England. On that note, I sure will enjoy my time in Wales. I’m leaving on Friday night – Saturday morning. Any suggestions as to what I should see in Wales? Hows the weather there right now?
How is the weather in Wales now? you ask. Think of rain. But wetter. However, it’s wonderful. It always comes down in little pieces! (With exceptions.)
Wales stays green all year. The sheep outnumber the people. But there is no confusion, the sheep having four legs. North Wales is picturesque and has little mountains. Mid-Wales is hilly and has big reservoirs. South Wales is flatter. Houses tend to be squashed together. The best land is needed for farming. Wales is mostly hills.
Look for the big “i” sign [information office] in towns throughout Britain, for advice, cheap maps, places to visit plus brochures on castles, houses, crafts, etc. They will have a list of all places to stay, and will book for you and tell you about transport.
Welsh roads are narrow and winding. Trains are not modern and small. National Express coaches from London, Victoria are cheaper and go to Wales. (But watch your possessions there!)
Look right when you cross the road!
Try “Fish and Chips”, but ask a woman for the very best shops and quality. “Health Food” shops, muesli/oats and vegetarian restaurants prove useful.
As you aim to see your friend in Cardiff, it is difficult to make good suggestions. Your instinct will find more of interest and surprise than I can suggest. Wherever you go, personal discoveries are to right and left, and inside too.
Take care, Katrina!
Alastair
Alastair Lancaster´s last blog ..Hug Special 2
Thanks for the advice, Alastair!